I was a rebellious wild girl when I met him. I did not take drugs or smoke or drink but running away from home was my routine. I did not run away to my friends’ houses or to my grandmother’s house but I ran away to neighbouring countries. I thought, my parents would easily find me if I run away to my friends’ or my grandparents’. Besides, money is not a problem to me. My parents feed me with loads of money ever since I was born.
The first time I ran away to Singapore really made them worried. They, themselves, went there to pick me up. I was enjoying a week without them before they found me in Singapore. They took me home and grounded me for a month. I was home-schooled and was never let out for a month. Not even to the porch of my house. I was guarded 24 hours, seven days without fail. But as my punishment came towards the end, I was planning to run away again.
I cannot stand to stay for long at home. My parents always fight and bickering. I was the eldest and I was the wildest. I did not care about how I am the eldest and should portray some good examples for my younger siblings. In my mind, they were just kids and did not understand a thing about life. My parents had me when they were too young. They thought of giving me away but both sides of my grandparents’ stopped them from doing so. That was also the reason why my brother was born 13 years after my birth. Since I was stopped from being given away, they blamed each other whenever I did something wrong. They never did blame me for what I did.
The second time I ran away, I ran to Australia. So far, that was the furthest and the longest I ever made for my run away life. It took them a month to locate my whereabouts. I even thought that they finally let me off this time. They took me home and grounded me again. This time, I was grounded for six months. For one whole month the guards guarded me well. Entering the second month, they started to take it easy. During the third month, I managed to ask a friend to help me sneak out despite the fact that all kind of communication with the outside world was cut off.
For the third time, I ran away from home again. I took even more money than before and less clothes and luggage. I ran away to Bali, Indonesia and asked a friend of mine to cover me up. In Bali, I met Zahrin, the man who changed my life. He is a Malaysian who lived there because of his father worked there. His house was next to the hotel I stayed in Bali. He is two years older than me. I made friend with him because of the same nationality and he acted like a brother to me.
I first met him at the beach near the hotel where I stayed. He caught my attention as I heard him talked in Malay and not in Indonesian. I came to him and chatted around just to satisfy my curiosity. That was when I knew he is a Malaysian. I befriend with him, since then. It was great to befriend with someone who did not know anything about me because they would not judge me as everyone else around did to me.
Zahrin taught me through his ways about valuable lessons of life. Even though he came from a broken family, he maintains good relationship with both of his parents. When he invited me to his house, I was hesitating because I was ashamed with him. But his father, Uncle Farith, insisted on inviting me to come over. Zahrin was surprised when I came alone. He asked me about my parents. That was when I told him everything about my situation. Even after I told Zahrin about my wild life, he did not judge me and even advised me as a big brother would do.
They told me that I should call my parents and tell them my whereabouts. I insisted on not calling them and just let them be. Zahrin and his father could not do anything about it. They invite me to stay over at their house rather than staying at the hotel and spend all my money. I could not resist as I did not have much money left. I was grateful that I was able to experience the greatness of having a loving family while staying with Zahrin’s family.
Zahrin’s step-mother, Aunt Ifaa Wirna, is a lovely lady and for the first time, I can feel the motherly touch. His twin little sisters, Aimy and Sarah, are adorable and made me reminded of my little brother and sister. After a week staying with them, my father’s first men came to pick me up. They were smarter this time and locate me within two weeks since my disappearance. Zahrin and his family sent me to the airport and watched me off. While waiting for my flight, memories with Zahrin came up and repeatedly playing in my head.
His words came through my mind, “Love is not something you create within your heart. It is not even gifted from your parents. It is a feeling of care and tender to someone you would not dare to lose.”
All this while, I thought I never love or being loved by my parents. I always thought my birth is bliss in disguise for them. But to think that one day I would never see them again, make me want to cherish this life and this moment with them. And that is when I know, I love my parents and I would not dare to lose them. Through Zahrin, God made me realize about the existence of love in my heart. And the existence of Zahrin made me realize, I need a man like him in my life. He really changed my life.
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